Final fill update and implant exchange surgery scheduled

I’m the worst blogger, I know. I’m sorry. I moved into my new apartment in September and I still don’t have Internet, but I don’t want to get it until I get a TV, which should be around November 10. For now, I have to mooch teh Interwebz off of work and my friends. But it is really awkward to post a new blog entry at work, when all of my blog posts have pictures of my boobs. It just doesn’t seem like the best idea, you know?

Let me update you on my breast reconstruction status: I had my final tissue expander fill with Dr. Festekjian on October 4. He filled each expander up to 700 ccs of saline. My expanders can hold up to 750 ccs, but Dr. Festekjian discouraged me from filling anymore. He said that the expanders already felt very firm and that the skin was tight, so more saline could be painful for me.

Stopping at 700 ccs was fine with me; I’m (at last) happy with the projection of my tissue expanders. You can’t see much of a difference between 650 ccs and 700 ccs, but here’s a comparison:

My implant exchange surgery is set for Monday, November 19, which is the Monday before Thanksgiving. I’ll be taking Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday off work, then Thursday and Friday are vacation days. I should be back to work the following Monday.

Here’s me and my 700 ccs of saline on each side!

Last Wednesday was Breast Reconstruction Awareness (BRA) Day at UCLA Medical Center. I went with my mom and Bryce to show some love for Dr. Festekjian. I’m actually really glad we went; I didn’t think I’d learn much, but I asked Dr. Da Lio (another plastic surgeon) about the differences between silicone implants and “gummy bear” implants.

I’ve been hearing a lot about gummy bear implants lately, and I wanted to know what was so great about them. Dr. Da Lio told me that UCLA does offer gummy bear implants (a form of very dense silicone implants), but they are not yet approved by the FDA so patients who opt for them must participate in a study. He said they’re firmer than silicone implants and that they retain their shape when cut. But the negative is that they are not a perfect circle (unlike other implants); if they flip around under the muscle, the breast shape will change. They are not guaranteed to flip, but Dr. Da Lio said that upper body exercise could make it happen. I like to kayak and I want to get into weight lifting, so the risk of gummy bears flipping is there for me. Silicone implants it is!

I’ll be going in for a pre-op appointment with Dr. Festekjian on November 8. I already know that he is going to order a few different sizes of silicone implants for me, but hopefully he’ll give me some idea of the actual numbers and sizes.

Once my implant exchange surgery is done, I should be finished with surgeries. Since I had a nipple-sparing mastectomy, I don’t need to worry about nipple tattoos. But when I was at BRA Day, I met a tattoo artist named Ruth Swissa who does medical tattoos for breast reconstruction patients. Her work was AMAZING! She had a bunch of temporary 3D nipple tattoos. They looked SO REAL. She had one on her arm and if I didn’t know anything about mastectomies or breast reconstruction, I would have been really freaked out by it because it really did look like she had an oddly-placed nipple! To any of my readers who are going to have nipple reconstruction: email me if you want a few of the nipple tattoos! I snagged some and would gladly mail a few to you.

OK, I’ve been mooching off of my friend’s Internet for too long. Happy Halloween, everyone! I leave you with this picture from Saturday evening of Bryce and me. Can you guess who we are?

Infection, Interrupted

Well, this is the longest I’ve gone without posting…I know I know, I’m a bad blogger! But better late than never.

Now, I know you’re all dying to hear about my trip to Vegas. I’d like to tell you about how awesome it was and how much richer it made me, but sadly I cannot report those glorious things…because I didn’t go! Whomp whomp

On Friday afternoon (August 24) I left work early for my scheduled fill with Maria, Dr. Festekjian’s wonderful nurse. I was supposed to go straight from UCLA to Long Beach where I would meet my friends and we’d hit the road to Las Vegas. But at the appointment, Maria noticed a slightly red spot on my left breast.

DUN DUN DUNNNNN (onomatopoeia anyone?). Red spots are not good, especially not for Her Royal Majesty the Queen of Cellulitis. I was pretty peeved because that spot had NOT been there in the morning.

Maria of course did the right thing by exercising caution, and in retrospect I’m glad she did—but believe me, in that moment I was not too pleased. I mean, come on…say it with me now…REALLY?! SERIOUSLY?! A RED SPOT…AGAIN?! #$*)(#@*$R JFAJFDSAF*#!)$#!

She decided to call Dr. Festekjian and consult with him. Well it just so happens that the good man himself was already stopping by UCLA (he spent the day working at the VA) so he came in to investigate. He poked and prodded for a while before determining that “he was not impressed.”

HOWEVER…given my history of infection, Dr. Festekjian decided to put me on antibiotics. He also advised that I avoid submerging myself in water (read: no swimming) and that I avoid sweating excessively (read: no 100 degree heat). Well, damn. Vegas in the summer without drinking, swimming and sweating just didn’t sound like very much fun.

Neither Dr. Festekjian nor Maria suggested I cancel my trip, but Dr. Festekjian did say that if the red spot worsened, I would need to come back in and possibly start IV antibiotics. BLEH! The thought of driving all the way to Vegas just to turn around and drive all the way back to Los Angeles was not very appealing.

I consulted my friends about it and they all agreed that it was not worth risking my health just for one weekend. We were able to reschedule the trip, and my friends still had fun doing touristy things around LA (they’re from Northern California). Side note: As much as it upset me to not be able to go to Vegas, I was still very touched by my friends’ response to the sudden change in plans. They were all so understanding and flexible, and even served as a sort of voice of reason for me when I was trying to figure out how to handle the situation. 

Even though we didn’t make it to Vegas, we still had a fun weekend. Thanks Kim, Jo and Jill!

OK, so fast forward to this past Thursday. I went to UCLA to see Dr. Festekjian, and he confirmed that the red spot was gone and that we could proceed with my tissue expander fills. I am pretty sure the red spot was probably not an infection; if anything, I think I just slept on my tissue expander wrong and the pressure created that discoloration. But I am happy that we did not just dismiss it. I’ve come too far on this road to let it get screwed up, so being cautious is necessary.

Since Dr. Festekjian and Maria decided against giving me a fill that previous Friday, I was behind 50 ccs. I did manage to talk Dr. Festekjian into giving me 75 ccs during Thursday’s appointment. So now I’m at 400 ccs on the left and 550 ccs on the right. We’re catching up, baby!

My next tissue expander fill is on Friday afternoon, and after that I’ll be…wait for it…MOVING INTO MY NEW APARTMENT!

Yep, that’s right. I’m saying GOODBYE to my parents’ place in Redondo Beach and moving out into the real world! I managed to find a relatively-inexpensive (by LA standards) apartment a few miles from my office. The biggest perk will definitely be skipping out on all of the traffic I’ve come to love loathe.

But I will miss my puppy Madeline and my mommy packing me lunch. =( Give it two weeks and I’ll be begging my parents to take me back!

I love Hendrix. Also, that is Bryce’s hand, not mine. I do not have man thumbs.

I hope everyone had a great Labor Day. Bryce, Hendrix, and I spent the weekend up in Yosemite. I’m happy to report that I went kayaking on the lake twice and I even worked on my shot at the archery range. It’s been about ten years since I last touched an archery bow so I’m a wee bit rusty, but I’ll be back to my Katniss status in no time.

The kayaking and archery did make me think a lot about my upper body strength. When all of my surgeries are over (hopefully November) I think my next “project” will be getting some freakin’ muscle. I am such a weakling! Does anyone have any suggestions for upper body workouts? And keep in mind that I have a very short attention span when it comes to exercise. Fun and shiny=good!

Oh you know, just training for the Hundred Years’ War. BATTLE OF AGINCOURT, YEAH! [/nerd]

Memorial Day weekend and the completion of my bikini!

I’m sorry it’s been over a week since I’ve written. Not much happened last week, besides going to work each day.

HOWEVER…last weekend…well, that was awesome!

On Thursday I left the office at 1 pm and met Bryce, Danielle, and Danielle’s boyfriend John at my house at USC. Bryce’s best friend (also named John) and his girlfriend Wdee also met us there. Around 2 pm, after packing the cars, we all got on the road to head up to Camp Horn in Northern California.

Camp Horn is our home away from home, our sanctuary in the Sierras, our lair by the lake. It’s located in Pine Mountain Lake, a gated community within the town of Groveland that’s situated just 26 miles west of Yosemite.

The Memorial Day trip to Camp Horn had been planned for over two months, but after my tissue expander was removed, I started to really dread the idea of going up there. Sure, Danielle and Bryce said that we didn’t have to go swimming or kayaking in the lake, but I just knew I would be miserable staring at that beautiful glassy water.  I was almost ready to call off the trip. That was until the idea for my bikini was born!

Once I realized I could still enjoy the water even without my left breast (thank you, Waterproof Falsie), I was so excited for our trip. And really, it was everything I wanted it to be.

The first thing I did when I unlocked the door to Camp Horn on Thursday night was try on the bikini…and ohmigawd, it was perfect. Seriously, my mom is a genius. I was so so so so so so happy with how it looked that I wore it around for the next hour.

Here’s me in my awesome bikini! Can you even tell that I’m missing a boob?!

The thick straps on the bikini were very supportive so the Waterproof Falsie didn’t sag, and you couldn’t even see the pocket it sat in because my mom did such a good job with the sewing.

When I went in the hot tub, the Waterproof Falsie bubbled a little bit (tehehe) but only as much as any bikini might bubble from air build-up. And once I hung it up after getting out of the water, it only took a few hours to dry! The bead system on the Waterproof Falsie works very well. I highly recommend it for any post-mastectomy ladies who are looking for an inexpensive waterproof prosthesis!

Hot tub time!

The weekend was filled with lots of food (the boys love to barbecue), some gambling at the local Indian casino, a visit to Cover’s Apple Ranch, tons of karaoke (“A Boy Named Sue,” anyone?), a few games of beer pong, daily hot tub soaks, a rifle shoot-off, five caught fishies, and my favorite activity: kayaking!

Look at me, kayaking like a mad woman on Pine Mountain Lake!

For the first few days, the weather was rather cold and drizzly. But on Sunday the clouds broke, the sun came through, and the temperature got hot! We threw the blue kayak (named Prospero) into the truck and brought it down to the beach. My mom’s pink sit-on-top kayak was already down there. Bryce and I kayaked around the lake twice on Sunday. I spent almost an hour and half on the water.

I’m very happy to report that my arms and upper body didn’t hurt at all from the kayaking. I was concerned that the mastectomy would limit my range of motion for paddling and that it would affect my stamina. Much to my pleasant surprise, I was fine out on the water, and the next morning I had no soreness in my upper body. Yay!

All in all, the weekend was awesome. The only downside is that I have a wicked sunburn on my stomach and thighs. Naughty Rachel! I really need to start taking sun protection seriously. Does anyone have a recommendation for spray-on sunscreen that is high in SPF and non-comedogenic? I have oily and acne-prone skin, so I need to find something that won’t clog my pores. I have a good sunscreen for my face, but I want to find a product that is easy to apply for body coverage.

On a closing note, I want to take a minute to speak to any ladies out there who have lost an implant or a tissue expander after a mastectomy. I know it looks super awkward right now, being completely flat-chested on one side—but don’t let it stop you from doing what you love and being who you are. Get creative with your appearance and your solutions. If I hadn’t remembered how talented my mom is at sewing, I bet my awesome weekend swimming and kayaking would have never happened. If I hadn’t explored my options (such as visiting the kind ladies at Intimate Image who set me up with the Waterproof Falsie), I would still be cursing at the idea of putting a cotton prosthesis into a bikini top.

It sucks right now, I know. But remember that this struggle is really just a little hiccup, and you’ve got to do what you can to make it better for yourself.

Here’s what the bikini looks like from the inside, with the pocket sewn in and the prosthesis inserted.